This is going to go Letterman style, where you go backwards, and the number one answer is always a big letdown since its the least funny of the 10...
10. Diaper Blowouts - Mere diapers, no matter the type, can't always contain the glorious creations of a baby
9. The quivering lip - Simultaneously the cutest and saddest thing you can see a little helpless baby do...
8. Lack of sleep is for real - You really don't get enough sleep for weeks - I always joked about this and thought it was funny that new parents don't get sleep... But you really don't - and it isn't funny. This one belongs in the "I heard you, but I didn't really understand". Now I know why the first question anyone asks a new parent is "Getting any sleep?". The scary part is that I even had it way better than Jenna.
7. Staring contests- Babies seem to be into staring for long periods of time. You can try to beat them, but you will lose.
6. Cuteness overload - Your baby is the cutest thing in the world. I never thought babies were cute until Laina was born, now everthing she does is absolutely the most adorable thing I've ever seen.
5. Baby Acrobatics - Babies like to try to dive out of your hands. Maybe this is just Laina, but it seems like she knows when I've got her one-handed, because that's when she decides to pull a Greg Louganis. It completely freaks me out every time, but I guess it keeps me on my toes...
4. Emotional Rollercoasters - Emotions can turn on a dime. She can go from full-on baby smile to red-faced scream in nanoseconds... Usually its when you're trying to grab the camera - as evidenced by this photo:
3. The Sleep Conspiracy - Babies like to do all their sleeping when your out and about, and other people can see them. That way, it appears to the outside world that they just sleep all the time. I think this is a widespread baby conspiracy to convince would-be-parents that babies are "low maintenance", thus ensuring the continued production of their kind.
2. Boringness - Newborns don't really like to play much. All those toys you got at the baby shower don't really do anything for her until shes a couple months old. You can put on the best puppet show that ever was, and get nothing but a blank stare, or worse, one of those red-faced cries...
1. Onesie Aversion - Infants (or at least ours) don't like getting dressed, and you have to change them multiple times a day. My theory is this has to do with the similarity of the sensation of having a onesie pulled over one's head to the all-too recent and traumatic journey from womb to gloved hand...
So there you have it. Maybe that wasn't the "Top" 10, but more like "Ten Things I Could think of as I typed".
If you veterans have some more, feel free to post them in the comments section...
8 comments:
I like number 5. Babies love to leap from your arms. I generally carry Ainsley with one arm and my chin on her shoulder to avoid the acrobatics. It will be trickier when you have Laina by the hand and a new baby on your shoulder too.
About number 1... most onsies can be pulled up and then you just slip their arms into them. That's why the necks are so big. I usually take them off this way as they are generally soaked and put new ones on over the head (no idea why), but my favorite ones are the snap ones that don't go over the head at all. Just some wisdom for future shopping...
Hmmm... other things no one tells you... for me it was how to collapse the stroller. Opening it was fine, but then I couldn't get it back in the car my first outing with Aubrey. Oops. And I never really had a a grasp on that whole no head control thing with either kid. Luckily it doesn't fall off when you forget!
Gross. Now I'm picturing a pee covered (or worse) onsie going over a porr little babies head.
umm hello! you have 2 cute nieces and 1 cute nephew :) i will agree laina is very cute though! :)
I will apologize on Jay's behalf for saying he never thought babies were very cute before Laina. I think what he meant is that when it's your own it's sooo different. Every little thing they do is cute, yes, even pooping!
Well, I don't know if I've found the pooping cute (ok, maybe the face she makes in the process).
Its definitely waayy different when its your own baby. I did think my little nieces and nephew were cute as babies, but frankly I just didn't know what to do with them at the time, so I kind of kept my distance...
Just so you are fore warned, I haven't slept through the night in like 4 years!
Talk about being cranky!!
We remember the not sleeping part all too well, even after 28 years. I'm not sure if I told you when we were there for the visit, but I remember telling mom that they need to make a special deal for parents with young children. Like special lines or go to the front of the line @ checkout stands at stores, the postoffice, DMV, Dr's office whatever. And special valets while their at it so you can just pull up to the curb. And maybe concierge's at these kind of places just for parents w/ small kids who can help with the special needs that you might find yourselves dealing with. Becouse hey seriously, parents of young kids aren't getting any sleep, or a whole lot else for that matter. You guys deserve a special VIP pass in life. So know that I'm voting for the new no waiting checkout for you guys. But in the mean time I'll just keep on being really proud of you and cheering you on!
Post a Comment