Waiting for God?

I feel I'm in an interesting situation. This post might jump around a bit but that's just how my brain's working right now.

Have you heard the story of a guy who's town is flooding? Probably. There are some different variations but the one I pulled off a Christian jokes page goes like this:

The flood was coming and word was sent to evacuate. One farmer sat on his porch and told the rescue team. "I'm waiting for God, He'll save me." Soon the water rose and the farmer was forced to the second story of his house. The rescue boat came but he told them. "I'm waiting for God He'll save me." Soon the farmer was forced to the top of his roof. The rescue helicopter came but he told them. "I'm waiting for God, He'll save me." The water rose and the farmer drowned. On his arrival in heaven he asked God, "Why didn't you save me? I waited for you but you never came." God replied. "I came three times."

I'll get back to the story in a minute. In our lifegroup at church, we're going through a book called "Walking with God" by John Eldredge. We're only a few sections in but the gist of it is that you can talk to God and hear from God on a day to day basis. I'm liking it and really trying out some of the principles and ideas he talks about.

So back to the story. Was it really wrong of the guy to wait for God and expect big things? Bigger miracles than a boat and a helicopter? Lately (as in, just this past day and a half or so) I've been feeling like I'm trying to rely too much on my own devices in the midst of our own little "crisis". OK, so maybe a better analogy would be if the guy in the story tried to build his own boat to save himself. I feel like that's what I'm doing. Trying to build my own boat. By trying to sell more baby leggings and diapers and really putting some time and effort into my Usana business and picking up extra hours at the stable. I'm not relying on God. This is where the book we're reading ties in. I really feel like God is telling me to stop trying to do it on my own and rest in him. To let him provide.

But that brings me right back to the guy on the roof in the flood. Maybe God is providing for us by these other means. I mean, my Etsy sales have never been so good. My Usana business is growing. The barn owner has been so gracious in giving me more hours even though she knows it's only until Jay finds work. I don't want to be an idiot and miss the provision God already is giving. So where is the balance? Is one mind set correct and the other wrong? Do I listen to the little voice in my head (that I think is God) telling me to rest? Or do I rest in knowing that God already is providing? Am I waiting for some sort of big miracle or can I be confident and content in where we are now? Maybe these seemingly conflicting thoughts can actually cohabitate in my mind - one is not wrong nor the other right. Maybe I need to stop and ask God, "exactly what is this 'rest' you keep mentioning?"

Laina's Day at the Barn

Jay brought Laina out to the barn on Saturday while I was there working and riding. She loves everything tractor and farm, so she had a blast. While I was riding, I asked her if she wanted to sit on the horse, and she said yes, but when she got up close and personal, she decided no. At least she helped me brush and wanted to pet Midnight.

Grandma and Grandpa come to visit

We had a great long weekend with my parents who left yesterday. Laina loved having her Grandma and Grandpa here to play with her and they set the bar pretty high! They entertained her with elaborate games of a version of peek-a-boo they called "hi there" with the Three Little Pigs and other toys, and now she is wanting to pretty much do nothing else.

We made some delicious and healthy home cooked meals and also got treated to very yummy Thai food in Denver called Swing Thai.

We spent Monday morning at the Denver Zoo and had a great time. The weather was cold and the animals were feeling fresh. We saw the porcupines and bears running around playing (not together, of course), the warthogs sparring, and even the awesome tiger was up for a minute. I've never seen the animals so energized at the zoo before. We also got to see the sea lion and elephant perform.

It seems the visits by family are always too short, and we are looking forward to another visit in summer!

Updates and...pizza

The big news - Jay had an interview today and has another one next week. I guess it went well and I'll let him blog more about it later if he wants to. I'm still working about 3 days a week at the barn plus doing good business with Laina's Laundry and also Usana. Today I got a call from church asking if I would do paid childcare for an 8 week course they are offering on Friday nights. So God is definitely providing!

We are hopeful that Jay will get a job offer out of one of these interviews, but if not we are still praying that more interviews come his way.

My parents are coming out for a visit this weekend so that will be a nice treat and I'm looking forward for them to spend more time with Laina and catch up on all her growing and learning!

And a little bit of small news - I got my first pizza stone and make this oh-so-delicious pizza on it and it turned out so well! I've always made pizza on a cookie sheet but this stone really made the crust perfect.

Laina's genetic hand-me-downs...

Well, it had to happen at some point. Laina is, after all, half Hoskinson, and so I should have expected her to start exhibiting some classic behavior that can only be attributed to my half of the gene pool. Unfortunately, her Hoskinson-like tendencies are being twisted and in some ways amplified by the odd behavior only seen on the Ali side. Pictures speak a thousand words.


First off, a Hosko-Ali mixture. She started out feeding her toys "spicy peas" whenever she ate because it was sort of funny (classic Hoskinson). And she even carried the joke on long past its shelf-life (also classic Hoskinson). But she's gone beyond that and turned it into somewhat of an obsession with feeding every toy in the room when she's eating. And they can't share a pea, they each need their own, and the chair needs to be pulled in all the way (Ali-like). This photo was taken at what was hopefully the peak of attendance at the spicy pea buffet, as today only her bus was available to dine.

Next is classic Hoskinsonitis. Olives on the fingers. Anything for a laugh. Surprisingly Jenna introduced her to the idea, and even helped her do it, so I might suspect there's some Ali-ness in this one as well.


And then there's the Jelly-Joker. A little more jolly than the Heath Ledger version, and she didn't need to be dipped in a vat of chemicals to get this way, just ate a particularly jelly-saturated PBJ. This is all Laina. Speaking of PBJ sandwiches, I made the mistake of introducing Laina to the Peanut Butter Jelly Time song... and had to sing it with every PBJ I gave her for a couple of weeks. The fact that she loves the song? Hoskinson. Making me sing it over and over for weeks? Ali.

So there you have our two-in-one daughter. Sorry for handing down all the idiosyncrasies, Laina.

Laina's first pig-tails

I put pig-tails in Laina's hair for the first time the other day. I can't believe her hair is long enough to put into pig-tails! She didn't like the process of me doing it, but afterward when she saw her hair in the mirror she loved it. Now she asks for "piggies". It's pretty cute. She looks like such a little girl, not a baby anymore!

Yes, we are Still Alive

I know we haven't blogged much lately. Everything is a little more chaotic right now than normal, but things are okay. I don't remember how much Jay posted in the last installment, but he is still looking for work. I am working 3 days a week at the stables now, and that brings in a little bit of income. I also have my little baby diaper/clothing business going fairly well right now and just got my embellished prefolds listed in Pampered Buns' shop! That is exciting for me to see my stuff in an actual shop! I also have my nutritional supplement/wellness business going very well and plan to make a full time income with it by year's end! I am going to an all-day training this Saturday to learn about health and nutrition and how the products I'm selling fit into a healthy lifestyle. This is exciting for me because I've always been interested in healthy living and nutrition and had even thought of becoming a nutritionist at one point. Now I have the opportunity to turn yet another of my interests into a career.

So, in spite of Jay losing his job, God is good and I know that He will be the ultimate providor for our family. The message at church last Sunday actually got me thinking about this whole situation differently. It was on John 11 and the death of Lazarus. When Jesus heard of Lazarus' sickness, he said "this sickness will not end in death. No, it is for God's glory so that God's Son may be glorified through it." I'm not sure why I related this to our situation, but I realized that the outcome of this situation will be for God's glory. It is not for us. It isn't so Jay can get a better job, or so that we can be in a "better place" in the long run. It's not about us suffering or having to learn to rely on God (once again). It isn't about us at all. It's about Him. I think the outcome of this situation is going to be something that brings glory to God. I have no idea what that means, but I still believe it. It's hard to be in a place of waiting and not knowing. But I trust in Him and know that we are here to serve His purpose and that if we let His will be done, this will all serve to glorify Him.